Go outside. (You are nature.)
The Green Crayon
Hi Friends,
It’s Tuesday, which means that at 7:59am my neighbors are running into the street to move their cars before getting a street sweeping ticket. Maybe it’s just Glendale’s way of getting us outside early for all the added health benefits??? I’m sure that’s it.
No one is shocked to learn that being in nature is good for you—the sun’s vitamin D, the salt water, the tree’s oxygen. Maybe we’re also aware of the spiritual benefits of getting out into the wilderness to encounter quieter voices that can’t be heard in the daily grind; of mountaintop experiences of awe; of the way green spaces provide respite amidst a sea of unforgiving cement; of watching a bird be a bird and finding it healed your heart.
But we don’t talk much about the social benefits of going outside. (Unless it’s to lament kids building square trees in Minecraft instead of climbing them.) I’m very excited to give you the Green Crayon today to dream up ways to connect outside. After solitude (the White Crayon) and knowing that there’s nothing wrong with you (the Black Crayon), I’m going wide. As wide as God’s Green Earth, taking in the more-than-human ecosystems of which we are a part.
This is one shared place where we already belong. Spending time outside fosters a deep sense of belonging to the bigger, life-affirming, and ordered natural world. And as we come to know its ways, its features, its names…we find ourselves tied to it in a dynamic bond of mutual care. When we know that we belong to the tree and that the tree belongs to us, we are much more grounded as we enter into social relationships.
Essentially, knowing the friendliness and beauty that you’re part of takes much of the fear and insecurity out of how we approach people. This rootedness can relieve some of the burden that gets placed on human relationships to meet ALL of our relational needs. Without this layer of belonging, when relationships with people break or end, we may feel a free-falling sensation. And that is not just painful, it is dangerous as it leads us to the false conclusion that not only may there be something wrong with us, but also that there may be something wrong with the universe. It may, in fact, be apathetic or hostile. It may look like this famous painting, which is basically an old version of the Home Alone face…both literally experiencing the terror of utter aloneness.
Let’s zoom out to that infamous shot from Apollo 8 in 1968. This is home.
Here are 6 curious ways that going outside can foster connection:
Playing in the street: The Atlantic has an incredible article out on what we lost when kids stopped playing in the street.
Looking at a leaf together: Socializing has become such an ordeal. That’s partly due to a narrow definition of what “counts” as socializing. Going “out” together does NOT have to include spending money, the fuss of parking, or some kind of event. Thich Nhat Hahn suggests that two friends looking at a leaf together is one of the easiest ways to bond. Check out his How To Walk for #3.
Walking in Nature sends us home: When we walk outside, our heart’s at 60-80 beats/minute, which is the same rhythm as our mom’s resting heart rate in the womb. When we walk, we are simulating the safest, coziest, most supportive place on earth—our first home. While many of us may have complex relationships with our moms, this is a gentle way of reconnecting back to our first moments of life. Thanks to author Rebekah Lyons for this stat!
Simplifying to essentials: Thoreau’s famous experiment living close to the bone in a cabin on Walden pond led to his conclusion that happiness in life is found through, “Simplicity, simplicity, simplicity.” As we get in synch with nature, we too are brought back into the simplicity of connection. The way the tree waves is how naturally we come to wave at a stranger; the way the stream effortlessly flows is how our conversations begin to run…
Time in Nature (and Doing community service outside) alleviates loneliness: Researcher Jill Litt headed up a study showing the power of engaging in nature to lessen loneliness. There’s a lot out there on how community service also helps us meaningfully connect around a shared purpose. But when you combine these—doing community service in nature—results are supercharged.
Hugging trees is not just for hippies: During the pandemic, when many were starved for physical touch, the Icelandic Forestry Department put out an advisory recommending that we start hugging trees. For real. I told my online cohort of CLICK! students about this to get their reactions. One student took up the challenge and ended up writing the most moving piece on her relationship with a neighborhood tree. She’s been able to use that experience to connect with thousands of readers, the people in her neighborhood, and her peers in the class.
5 Ways to Go Outside.
Go outside on the hour every hour for one day. (Waking hours unless you are very Type A.) Just pay attention for 2 minutes to how the light is changing or what the sky looks like.
Walk-n-Talks: instead of meeting at a cafe or restaurant, turn your hangouts into strolls.
Nature Journals: draw and write about what is outside your window. The practice of paying close attention works the core muscle we need in relationships: being open and curious.
Outdoor Meetings: If you convene meetings, make some of them outdoors, rain or shine. Fluorescent lights suck. Screens suck. Literally, they steal your soul.
Green Space Mapping: as a family or team, use Google maps to figure out where the green spaces are in your neighborhoods and gamify checking each of them out.
My dog (Boba) is telling me it’s time TO GO OUTSIDE. So looking forward to creating with you tomorrow!
Take Care,
Cat
P.S. - I’m opening at Etsy store as my online marketplace for digital downloads. This series will be my first e-book, so I’ll post the link for you when it’s ready.